These words keep repeating over and over in my head. “You are not a martyr other people have lost children, other people have had a hard time getting pregnant.”
Yes, other people have lost children. Yes, other people have difficulties getting and sustaining a pregnancy. I never said I was a martyr, rather I’d call it an advocate. So what if I am open about publicly discussing something so emotional or even simply acknowledging that these events occurred in my life rather than keeping my feelings inside to kill me bit by bit. Everyone handles situations in their own way, this is how I handle what has happened to me, to us…by talking and writing and holding my angels in my heart and acknowledging that this was a long hard battle to get our miracle baby.
I am not a martyr, but I am not going to keep my mouth shut because you don’t feel I am special enough to share my struggles. Sometimes I need to talk and I have helped a lot of people in doing so…maybe one day someone can help me much like I have helped others. I will not hold back my feelings because you don’t think what I went through is worthy enough to deserve your compassion.
I am not a martyr but I deserve to be able to speak about what happened to me much like you are free to speak your mind without a filter whenever you so choose and expect everyone to not get offended.
I am done being treated like garbage. I am done living my life in fear. I am done being depressed over being treated wrongfully by people who are supposed to be there for me.
I need to make some changes for the good of my family…it’s going to be a long and difficult process but we need positivity back in our lives or I am afraid I will have a breakdown.